THE SET-UP

Ah, the other chick. Hate her or love her, she’s not in the relationship by herself. Sometimes she knows; at other times, she doesn’t. Guys, what’s the motive behind getting yourself one of those? Is it nature or nurture? Girls, would you willingly be a side chick?

If you already are, what’s your aim? To dislodge the main chick or just for fun?

THE FORMATION

Jumoke

Jumoke

Eniola

Eniola

Taiwo

Taiwo

Rachael

Rachael

Biodun

Biodun

Fatimah

Fatimah

Hauwa

Hauwa

Niyi

Niyi

JUMOKE

Boys are greedy.

People are greedy.

That is why boys keep side chicks (and girls keep side guys). Having a side piece is fun. You know, sneaking around, the mystery of the whole exercise. The popular excuse is that the side pieces usually do the things that your main partner doesn’t do. Bullshit!

If you want to have a side piece, by all means, have one. Just don’t give the rubbish excuse about the lack in your main partner. Say it with your chest. “I am a greedy person and I want to have extra, just because.”

That being said, I can totally be a side chic because he’d most likely be my side guy too.

ENIOLA

What is the definition of a Main Chick? Because I don’t see the difference between the said main and the sides. They are all your chicks. Of course, you can’t tell the main everything you’ll tell the side. Same way you can always tell the side some things you’ll never tell the main. So really, they are one. You’re the only difference. They are dating your personality, to be honest. If your personality feels like church, you get yourself a church. Whenever it feels like a bitch, you get yourself a bad bitch! Simple.

It’s both nature & nurture like my girl Rasheeda (can’t remember the twitter handle) said. I mean, it’s ok to have 4 & so number of wives but when I have more than one girlfriend, it’s a crime? LOL, I honourably disagree. Arigato!

TAIWO

This society has conditioned us to believe that it makes a man a man if he can keep two or more women. Hence one reason why men may want to have harems of women. Again, a former boss of mine once said a man’s love is too massive for any one woman to be sole custodian of and in such cases, the man will wear the woman out if he gives her all his love. Hence the need for the man to diversify. As much as I believe that it is all hogwash, to each his own.

So would I willingly be a side chick? Definitely not. Aside from the fear of an acid bath which of course is more than enough motivation to stay away and the many main chick vs side chick dealings out there, my mind will torture me to impossible ends knowing I’m the backup option. No, thank you.

RACHAEL

I wouldn’t willingly be a side chick, except, of course, the man in question is Richard Mofe Damijo or Boris Kodjoe. Then I’d do it for whatever reason he wants- to own, for fun or to gloat.

BIODUN

Frankly speaking, men (and by extension boys) are hunters. It’s how we’re wired, it’s how our DNA is programmed and we’ve been that way since biblical times (hats off to King Solomon, patron Saint of Yoruba demons). Many of us remember our grandfathers had at least two wives (the additions started from being side chicks) and a few have fresher insight by virtue of being from polygamous households. Over the years some of us have learned or have been forced by civilisation/economics to hide our hunger for fresh meat and embrace ‘monochopping’ but the majority still possesses that primal urge for game. Even if society and its laws dictate that we mostly hide our fangs behind the façade of tameness, we are what we are and remain what we’ve always been – hunters, beasts who’ll always crave the taste of blood.

I can choose to say it’s the joy of pursuit (and when you acquire, you just want to do it again, just like it is with chasing paper), the quest for variety, curiosity, selfishness, and a myriad of other perfectly explainable reasons. Sometimes, though, when all is said and done you find that there’s no tangible (or sane) reason behind the hankering for running harems. It’s just nature (sue me), and FYI, the ladies play on the sly too.

FATIMAH

The boys who keep side chicks do so because they’re stupid enough to risk losing a good woman. And because they like stress; all that lying to cover tracks, wasting money to see the same movie twice. Buying birthday and valentine gift for two or three women. They simply just want to waste their time and resources instead of planning a future with the one. Everyone has a side piece these days, though, so *shrug*

HAUWA

There really isn’t any justified answer for this; I would use the word reasonable but let me just pick something subtle like ‘justified’ because the fact boys state for this action, can be so wawu. In school, I had friends that’ll blatantly say that even after marriage they’ll cheat so why won’t they have side chicks now that they’re young and ‘not tied down’ (like marriage is some sort of voodoo or a necessary evil).

The reasons always vary, depending on the self-entitled guy trying to justify why “there are things your girlfriend can’t give you and the only option is to get it somewhere else” . Oga, have you asked her if she can? Or you just played X and O in your head then picked the one that’ll favour you? “I like to date a girl that can get a conversation going, it’s not all about physical beauty. I want someone that will challenge me intellectually but the fact is no one is perfect. What she makes up for in intelligence she may lack in bed and you have to do the do one way or another. It’s simply a means to an end.”

Honestly, I really want to understand this but I can’t. And there are those who are annoyingly self-assured that a man should have more than one woman. “Sometimes you want oranges, sometimes you want apples”. Fruits? Really? So, I won’t try to conjure sorcery to explain it. I simply don’t understand why guys keep side chicks.

NIYI

Why do boys keep side chicks? Who knows? I think it’s greed. Why steal an extra meat from the pot of soup? Why ask for my coworker’s yam when mine is there in front of me swimming in beans? Greed. Me, I’m a firm believer in one being enough. I’ve asked a few of my friends, though, and an interesting answer I got was all girls taste different, all girls fuck different. Some give bomb head. Some moan so loud. Some give just as hard as they are given. Different girls, different pleasure derived. Me? I think it’s just greed.

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