Remember No Scrubs?
It was a TLC mega-hit of the late 90s. Yes, some of us are young-old like that. If you do remember it, you should also remember No Pigeons, Sporty Thievz’ hilarious rejoinder. If ever there was a one-hit wonder, it has to be Spotty Thievz. In fact, they were a two-song group, but boy what a rejoinder.
The lesson? Take the same issue to a room full of boys and then a room full of girls and you might as well be on different planets. Remember how Men are From Mars; Women are From Venus?
Aside: What kind of guy or girl will be today’s scrub or pigeon?
The normal operation of the eyes teach an important life lesson. When you look out of each individual eye, it becomes quickly apparent that two eyes, two perspectives, are fuller than one. (Are three eyes better than two, and four than three? is a question for the physicists.) Meanwhile, the physicists call that two-eye thing binocular vision.
And that’s why we started dydx.
dydx began life as a completely normal conversation between friends and then another. We quickly realised there was something of value in this divergence of opinions, heck, blindness to viewpoints of the other; perhaps we should make this into something beyond us?
Those first friends were Mobisola, and then Ayomidotun, both of them — come to think of it — my friends, collaborators and four-eyed. I should get glasses.
The first name we found was Vice-Versa, seeing how it means the view from the other side. It was wonky, too “intellectual”, something like Ifemelu’s Raceteenth blog, which they might get over there but ahem we might not over here. That was the verdict of a focus group. I love us and I expressed my strong reservations to such unfair, unfortunate insinuations, but agreed we needed a name with some pizzazz, something cool as hell (frozen over). In any case, viceversa.whatever was taken. Pizzazz had to be found.
Then we had a spot of “come out come out wherever you are.”
We went through some frankly horrifying options (which best remain unspoken) till some rudimentary genetics suggested to us a famous expression in the lingo of calculus.
dydx. Damn. Gold. This was how Mr Mungo Park — I find it hard to believe he has no Gabonese blood in him — must have felt when he discovered the River Niger (as those idiotic books say). And then the team expanded to include an enthusiastic gang of brilliant young men and women whose perspectives will be conversation starters.
Question everything. Boy-girl everything. That’s the dydx program. Get with it. Everything relating to sex, sexuality, relationships, gender, gender relations, being boy, being girl, burning boy-girl issues and more to come, as our tentacles spread.
Some of these conversations may be ones you’re familiar with, but we’re converging male and viewpoints in one face. The two-eyes-better-than-one thing. And the insights will be invaluable to both males and females (and perhaps to the intergender). Imagine finally figuring out what a girl’s “no” means (or doesn’t), or when to expect surprises when you go to a boy’s house. Or, interestingly enough, why boys fake orgasms and what female erection looks like.
dydx itself has no viewpoint except that it wants to bare one to the other as much as possible. Our culture is curiosity. We assume so much and mistake our assumptions for reality. No more, if we can help it. Come and be curious with us. We are not liberal or conservative. We simply are.
Sex? Relationships? Eye roll. Not another one. It does look like a tired space, true. But there’s more to sex and relationships (already we have sexuality and gender) than smut for the sake of it, exposés and hilarious — quite often exaggerated — stories of sexcapades or near. Smut is a fact of life and those stories are an important component of the conversations we want to start, but they are not all of it. Nor should they be.
There’ll be some science. There’ll be some hairy stuff, because what’s the world without hairy stuff? You can even start your own conversations. Most of all, there’ll be fun, plenty of fun. For folks who’d love to see us more frequently, we’re on Twitter, Facebook and more to come.
Let’s get into it